Mizwrite posted today about the altered standards of romance because of Twilight. As an adult reading the novel (cause I've only read Twilight so far), I approached it with open eyes for the roller coaster of romance but I wonder how much young girls really understand about the story. I mean, if Feminists have problems with Prince Charming, they should have huge problems with Edward Cullen. Personally, I don't see a problem with fairy tales because young children begin to understand the difference between fantasy and reality pretty quickly and fortunatly fairy tales have plenty of inter-personal reactions that are unrealistic this makes the "happily ever after" romance seem more unrealistic as well. Believe me, I completely understand that there are still problems with Cinderella and Sleeping Beauty, including problems that continue to plague women and men through adulthood, and many first marriages.
In the comments to the post, the issue of domestic violence was brought up and I completely agree. Both Edward and Bella are obsessed with one another and the fact that Edward must fight against his nature to suck Bella's blood is problematic. I also agree that Edward's fight against his nature is more a fight against addiction than the desire to hurt Bella. There is none of the usual literary reference to domestic violence - I specify literary because reality and literature are two very different mediums. Although the key phrases used in literature that reference domestic violence (i.e. "if I can't have her/him no one can" and others) frequently appear in real life, there are many other clues in real life that are not stressed in literature.
For me, the bigger problem is the mutual obsession that Edward and Bella have for one another. This type of obsession is frequently waved off as unimportant. But, as the Prince says in the final speech of Romeo and Juliet: "For never was a story of more woe/Than this of Juliet and her Romeo." Although most of the story centers around the prejudice of the two families, I also believe there is a strong message advocating waiting and growing before committing oneself to a partner for the rest of her/his life. Meyers does acknowledge this point, but overall I am left with a dangerous impression of the nature of romance.
I've not actually read _Twilight_ but in my life I've always held true to the fact that relationships must be worked at by both parties, both sides must give a little and take a little. Happy endings and love at first site, for me well should remain in fiction.
ReplyDeleteI've been married to my husband since October last year, but that's only the formal part ;) we've been together over 5 years and stayed together for a year before we got married. We don't have arguments(ala shouting at each other to submission), but we do have sometimes very clear differences which we discuss adult to adult.