Ask Apricot

A big Thank you! to Apricot from ask apricot for answering my request for fashion help. I really appriciate the time that was put in to answering my question and I'm super glad that images were included. To anyone interested in down to earth advice, I highly reccomened checking her out at ask apricot.

Money & Control

Just like the rest of the country, I’ve been having money issues. I’ve finally reached my last year of undergrad and because of the changes in lending procedures I’ve had a lot of difficulty arraigning my student loans. I did the grown up thing and set up a budget that includes all my expenses and I’ve worked out a plan that should meet that budget. At this point, I’ve put my plan into action and I’m waiting for results which, unfortunately, I don’t have control over. It’s the waiting that freaks me out.

I’m scared that my schoolwork will suffer because I’ll spend more time focusing on the money issues. Scared that I’ll feel that I have to fix the situation rather than just let it unfold and deal with the little issues as they appear.

Situations where I feel a lack of control tend to cause me more anxiety than they should. It’s as though my self-esteem is tied to my level of control. If I feel that I am in control, I value myself higher. I feel more competent when things run smoothly. However, I do have a plan that is no different from thousands of other students and other people really. Money issues are never certain for anyone. I need to remind myself that the current situation is uncertain but I’m still competent and I’ve come up with an effective plan. I just need to stick with it and be ready to adapt to slight hiccups.

Practice Makes Perfect

In keeping with my recent plan to post more, here's a flash movie review:

"Wanted" (2008)

The idea in intriguing: an office worker who has stopped caring about the trivial (and not so trivial) details of his life learns that his father was a top assassin and he inherited his father’s heightened abilities. However, the film itself seems torn between wanting to explore deep ideas of identity, fate, destiny, and the corruption of power on one hand; and fancy explosions, beautiful fight sequences, and impressive special effects on the other. As a result, the film suffers. It ends up catering to a visual audience at the expense of a plot driven audience. As a fan who enjoys and appreciates both aspects of films, I have to say that the special effects in “Wanted” far outweigh the plot. Which is unfortunate because the idea of the plot is so intriguing and there are so many more things a film, novel, or graphic novel could do with an idea like this one.

Why I go so long between posts:

I generally feel that things ought to be reviewed and edited before published. I am much more comfortable with my writing after letting it stew for a bit. I regurgitate the words in a fairly random order and then leave them to settle into the page. Then I come back and reorder those words, cut some out, add some, etc. Unfortunately, I rarely reach the point where I actually publish what I write. Sometimes it’s as simple as when I go back to what I’ve written, I’m not in the same headspace and no longer have the same passion for that idea. Other times I let my mind get in the way and convince me that what I’ve written is uninteresting.

What I’m working up to saying: I want to use my blog as practice publishing. Rather than saving my regurgitated words on my hard drive I’ll try to save (some) on here. I can always return to those words and rework them after they’ve been published. We’ll see how well that works, shall we?